I get it… and I’ve cried many tears because of it.
It’s hard when we are living in that space where our head knows God can do anything but our heart is heavy because He’s not doing what we are hoping for… what we’ve prayed for… what we’ve believed for, for a long while.
Three Helps for This Hurt
~ Lysa TerKeurst ~
- God often works in the unseen. Just because we can’t see it or feel it doesn’t mean He’s doing nothing.
- Is there something God has been prompting you to do that you’ve been resisting or delaying? Ask for the grace and courage to take that step today. The one who obeys God’s instruction today will be able to more clearly discern His direction for tomorrow.
- Don’t take what feels like a lack of intervention as a sign of His lack of affection. Look for ways today, God is showing you assurances of His love. His deep affection is all around you friend ❤
This season of growth has been intense and sometimes downright upsetting until I found out that I needed to change my mind about the situation. Let me explain.
So God has given me a certain assurance that my path is a certain one but the current circumstances don’t look like there is progress. I don’t always know what to think or how to think about things so I began asking God to clarify. Why didn’t I ever realise that He actually answers prayers? Ha! I had preconceived ideas of how He should work and it was according to how my limited mind works.
We were conditioned into thinking that God is only present when things are going the way we want them. So when things aren’t working it looks like He has gone and is looking the other way but there is nothing further from the truth than that.
I think about David after Nathan had come and chastised him for his relationship with Bathsheba. He fasted, prayed and cried to God for the life of his son for seven days then the child died. When the child died, he got up showered and ate to the astonishment of his people. His answer to them was ‘…now that he is dead, why should I go on fasting? Can I bring him back again? I will go to him, but he will not return to me.’ 2 Sam 12:23.
I know it sounds flippant but it isn’t. It is an expression of faith and a renewed mind that he could not alter the mind of God.
2019 has presented many instances where I have questioned the plan of God because it hasn’t made sense but I am aware that I was looking at things from my perspective and not God’s and that was the difference. This weekend He allowed me to begin to see that His ways even though inexplicable and seemingly impossible always bring good.
When someone who loves and serves Him dies, they go to Him, what is so bad about that? When someone who has been sick for a while rests in Him, they are out of pain and healed for ever, what is so bad about that? When I lose a house but still have health and breathe and I can regain what I had, what is so bad about that? When I have to get on a matatu to get everywhere, what is so bad about that? When I lose the business that I worked so hard to build but still have the contacts and energy to regroup, what is so bad about that?
When someone you think loves you walks away from you in your time of need as if you are well, what is so bad about that? When you love with all you have and know-how and it goes south or you pray for that baby with all you have and it doesn’t happen or you pray for the baby and they come but your partner walks away and disengages or you lose your pillar and friend in the middle of the biggest crisis? He will always ask me, what is so bad about that?
I am not being flippant but I have been through so much and every time without fail He has asked me what is so bad about that and I couldn’t see it. It took so long to understand until one day He had mercy on me and began to break things down. When He began showing me who I need to become and how I need to grow then I could see how the path I was on was the way to the finish line.
Do I understand it? Not always but I understand that this path is the reason I am alive. My goal is to become everything He says I am and to shift the world for Him. If a few challenges are in the way then so be it. Saying so be it, shifts how my mind works and accepts the realities around me.
He sees, He feels, He knows, so I can trust Him with my life.