I saw him from the bus window
He arrived just before the bus left
Dropped off by a beautiful woman
And he had love in his eyes as he looked at her
He was about six feet tall, dark chocolate complexion,
Something in him took
him beyond handsome
He wasn’t feminine in any way
But there was a softness about his appearance
He walked right to my seat…mmmh my seatmate
Oh my goodness, I hope he wasn’t a talkative one
He had a gentle smile and said hi
Then put his small bag on the over head rack
He settled in, put on his sweater, mitts and marvin
In went the ear phones and chosen play list
Crossed his hands, closed his eyes
And promptly became still, probably asleep
Eyes, closed, ding dong, lights out…just like that
How is that even fair?
How can someone sleep so easily?
The journey was long and he was asleep in minutes
Two hours and many kilometres later, I was still awake
My seatmate was still asleep as still as a log
Shoulders straight, head square and steady
It was as if he was in his own bed…he didn’t twitch
How can someone settle so deeply?
How did one still their body so completely?
How could someone be so comfortable in any place?
This was beyond me.
Am I that at home in my own skin?
Am I able to settle in and be me anywhere?
Am I solid and unmovable in my place?
Can I be completely still and rest?
There is so much to learn before I get there.
There is a lot of unpacking and decoding.
But there is a place of peace I am pursuing
A place of deep connection in my spirit
There is place within me that only God can reach
Once He gets it fully, I will be still
So I open the door for Him daily
Desperately longing for the stillness
There is a place within that is healing daily
Every breath is getting me closer
Every day is a new opportunity
Every thought is a step higher
There is a place that is getting stronger
My smile is coming from deeper within
From a healing heart and spirit
From a more stable human
I am better than I have ever been
I am getting better every day
I know the journey is still long
Yet I will walk it to the end