You Are Here


You are here and You said you will never leave,

We need you lord, we need you lord,
We need you Lord x4
You are true, and Your promises remain

We trust you lord, we trust you lord

We trust you Lord x4
You are king and You reign forever more

Reign in my life, reign in my life

Reign in my life x4

We love you Lord (repeat)

Dr. Tumi – You are here

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Jehovah God is with me always, has always been and will always be. I am just beginning to really grasp what this means? In the past my response was a normal one because knowing God was normal then questions begun to rise in my heart.

Do I actively connect, worship, listen, accept and respond or do I just enjoy the warmth of His embrace and walk away? Do I understand that there is as reason for this connection? Do I understand why He has chosen to work so deeply in me? Am I living out the fullness of my calling? Am I aware of His desired end game in my life? Do I really understand who I must connect with an pass on His love to? What do I need to showcase about Him and His plan for me? How can I say that I love and serve God but my life is bland and doesn’t reflect the very nature of my Father? Does my life reflect the deep sweet and intense flavour of God?

He is all loving and wise; He is a consuming fire, a righteous judge, a compassionate father, a rod, a staff. He keeps his word and promises. He is unchanged and unchanging. He turns to me and says I am here; I am ready to change your life. Take my hand and let’s walk together. He shows His love for me through nature, through people, circumstances, everything around me. He defines my view of the world, my conversations, He guides my choices and draws me in so that I am sure of my walk. He walks with me and though He doesn’t simplify the path, He teaches me that it is all about His plan and the process that will bring me into the fullness of His plan.

Nothing can ever change the fact that I am His and He is with me even when in the eyes of men my life is falling apart. Everything he allows me to walk through is for His honour and glory and my good. Nothing is in vain and I cannot fail as long as I am walking as he has instructed. The end game is to raise me to the perfect version of me He saw before He knit me together in my mother’s womb. The me that would be free of culture and religious practise but deeply steeped in His love and truth, led by His word and living out His will. Oh that I would become all that and then some. Oh that I would rise to the peak of His plan for me.

So Lord, reign in my life, take charge and control, raise me up to all you knew I would be, bring me into the fullness of who you saw before the foundations of the world. Draw me closer and reveal yourself to me, in me, with me and through me. Let it be known first in my heart and then through my life that You are indeed a true God.

Truly Living


It has been on my heart for a long time to do a devotional that captures my walk and the things I have learnt along the way. However every time I sat down to write it there were so many things competing for attention that I didn’t get around to it.

2017 the year of manifestation started with a clear knowledge that the time indeed has come to bring forth all those things that God has laid in my heart previously.

Truly Living simply shares lessons learnt as I learn to walk in total trust and fidelity to God and allow Him to undo everything I knew that was law and breathe His life into my life. Simple lessons that have and continue to change the way I live, love, share and care. Simple truths that have totally changed my view and the desires of my heart.

A deep work in my heart pour out for all.

This devotional is the proof of a new move of God in me.

Click here to get access to the book https://kyesubire.com/kyesubires-books/

Shalom

Nothing without you


I am on an ongoing journey to complete dependance on God. Sometimes I lose focus and got overwhelmed by the things going on in and around me. It creeps In one of those moments recently I just wanted to pack my bag and go home never to reappear then a chat with a dear, dear brother challenged me to change my focus and sent me back to my play list. The song at the top of the list was Nothing Without You by Dr. Tumi. This song flipped my thinking on its head. Look at these simple words…..

If it had not been for the Lord,
Who was always on my side,
The enemy would have swallowed us,
Would have drowned in the waters,
But our souls have found An Escape,
A hiding place in You,
The Fowler’s snare is broken,
Our help is in the Name of the Lord.

And I’m nothing without You, without You,
You are the air that I breathe
Can’t live without You, without You Jesus,
In You I live and move and have my being

Hosanna to Jehovah,
You are the air that I breathe
Hallelujah, hallelujah
In You I live and move and have my being

Could this be true? Is it possible that I am nothing without Him? Do I truly live, move and have my being only in Him? Is it true I can’t live without Him? Can this song be really true? Some scholars say such songs are emotive and cannot be true, that at the very least such thinking is farfetched and romanticised only useful for person to person relationships. Could they be right?

As I listened and allowed my heart to still, I realised that I had a choice to make. In that moment of total albeit temporary despair, I had to make a choice to give up or find a way out. In reality, the only place I could reach was the depths of my heart, but that place was empty, worn out, kaput!!! The only available way out of there was into the hiding place in Him that is based on His word and promise to be with me. The place where I could ask all my questions and face the failures in my life and find acceptance, correction and healing. A place of deep conviction of sin but even deeper conviction of love and compassion. He reminded me that before the foundations of the earth He knew

He reminded me that before the foundations of the earth He knew I would have this very experience this very day but He also knew that if I chose to turn to Him in total awareness that I couldn’t live without Him I would find strength, grace and enabling to come out stronger and better. I remembered Jesus in the Garden when His human spirit was overwhelmed with the reality that He was about to die, He found strength from talking to His father, remembering the love that drove this process and therefore let go of the need to be safe in the hands of the world for the safety in the arms of God based on the divine plan…to save the souls of mankind. He rose a stronger, better man

My hearts cry became that I find that same place and balance in God that He is there no matter what and His plan for me is above all others. I chose to lay down my life once again before Him knowing full well He’s got me covered.

 

Never Wasted!


IMG-20170305-WA0030There are times in life that things go diametrically different from our plans. I remember being in high school and failing harder than I ever had in my whole life before then and also after then. It didn’t matter how much I read, I failed. I had a D average for a couple of terms even after free marks in every class. My math teacher gave me a mark for every step of the question and I still had 16% in each paper so the average was 16%. So D average for several terms miraculously became a B- average and I went straight to university.

I had told God…mark my words…I told him and didn’t ask him. I said that on no uncertain terms would I go to pre-university. I didn’t make a grade for direct entrance I would learn a trade and pursue it. I wonder if my folks would have allowed that! Mmmmhhhh!

The poor grades had a massive impact on my sense of self and I struggled to prove to myself that I wasn’t foolish. Yes, I had begun to feel foolish with every failed exam. At the end of the day, it is another friend in university who helped me get past this sense of failure by believing in me and loving out of the despair.

Over the years as the despair would resurface when projects or life just isn’t working, this very friend would say things that made me mad enough with the way I had responded to force action and movement forward.

I now know that this person is my trigger person. They have license to tell me the truth whether or not I like it and stand there until they are sure I understand that it is love that drives them and not a mean spirit. I have come to understand that I don’t really have the depth and breadth of the latitude with them that they have with but that again is by divine design.

So it gets me thinking, what are we doing about the times in our lives when things aren’t working and we cannot see the way forward? Will we whine and complain or will we seek guidance and understanding for the depth, length and breadth of the situation.

It is better to understand that God has a plan that we cannot thwart and no lesson is wasted. How do I know? Quite simply! Romans 5:1-5 says “Faith Triumphs in Trouble”.

Therefore, having been justified by faith, we have[a] peace with God through our Lord Jesus Christ, through whom also we have access by faith into this grace in which we stand, and rejoice in hope of the glory of God. And not only that, but we also glory in tribulations, knowing that tribulation produces perseverance; and perseverance, character; and character, hope. Now hope does not disappoint, because the love of God has been poured out in our hearts by the Holy Spirit who was given to us.

Tribulation, struggle, challenge, hardships etc, pull or push us into the place of deeper engagement with God and a deeper expression of Him as long as it is the appointed path for us. I  have learnt to celebrate everything because it is how I will grow deeper and fuller into Him who thought of me before the foundations of the earth to honour him.

The Need To Focus


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Things have changed so much, whereas I need to be on the forefront of being a new creation and member of a new nation, I have another front I need to focus on. I must be on the forefront of growing into all that God has desired for me to grow into. This end is defined by the plan laid out for me before the foundations of the earth.

When I think about the psalm of David number 136 I read that God knew me before he knit me in my mother’s womb. Then I think about Jeremiah when God said, do not say you are a child for you are a prophet…I knew you before I knit you in your mother’s womb.’ Then talk about Christ who was sent to seek and save the lost…surely there is a plan for me even if I don’t see it or fully understand it right now. Every challenge, every fall, every tear, every joy, every sorrow has a place in God’s plan for my life. Everything must bring me closer to the cross and to the place that God has created for me in this life.

The way to success is to hear and walk with God. Walking with God has nothing to do with religious practice or a list of prescribed things that we do or don’t do. Walking with God is knowing His voice, hearing His word, acting on His word, going back over and over again to get clarification when it gets fuzzy, walking with those assigned to me, repeating the above over and over and over.

The bible records that every time David went to war ‘He inquired of the Lord.’ Meaning, that he never took it for granted that just because he was going back to a similar place, people and challenge. More interesting was that he asked God if he should actually go to war. Really? Wasn’t he a king? Didn’t he have to defend his kingdom? So why would he have to ask if he should go to war when his borders needed defending? I think that it was because he understood that the techniques and reason for the battle would be different each time, or he just realised he needed to know for certain that he was walking right.

What about me? Do I assume that since I have been on this road before I know what to do? Just think of Joshua and Caleb who knew what God had said about Israel. It affected how they responded when presented with the scare that the people of the Promised Land were giants. It was as if the knowledge of God and his word overshadowed the fear standing right in front of them. Why not us?

It makes me ask myself a few questions:

  • Do I have an on-going conversation with God about my life?
  • Do I know who he created me to be from the foundations of the earth?
  • Do I have his mind such that I can understand how anything I do affects his plan?
  • Am I even interested in walking in his path and that alone?

These questions expose the truth of my walk and I may not always want to see that. However, in this season, I must know who I am and what I need to grow into before I can be all I am for Him. Is it scary? Sometimes, but I am more scared about not reaching my fullness in Him. It is scarier for me to get to the end of life and not have achieved what I was sent here to do rather than live in fear of mandatory growth into His plan for me. I realise today that his plan, though it may be a steep climb, is the best thing I could ever do for myself and hence I remain connected to it.

Believe me, come what may…I choose to remain rooted in Him for there is nowhere I would rather be.

 

Am I really who I say I am?


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There are many things I have said I am but this year has made me rethink some of them.

Jean, you are now confusing me.

What do you mean Bo?

You are making life too hard and making me think too much.

It’s really not that hard Bo! As I have assessed myself, I realised that I need to be sure I am all that I am talking about or at the very least I am actively growing into it.

Please explain in English!

If I say I am patient and I am not yet there I must grow into it.

How?

Some say life will conspire to create it in me but I say, God will allow things to happen that will test that hypothesis for truth. The same is true with the prayers we pray.

Ok….

There is a song I love that says…’Make me righteous and holy, make me holy for you are holy, and purify me, with your presence…holy Lord.” I have sung along for a long time but this year, every time I hear that song I am conscious that I must be sure I really mean it.

Why?

If I mean that prayer, then I am ready for God to test the hypothesis.

And…..

I will stay put in the circumstances He allows because they will force me to respond and produce the very things I am singing.

Explain….

Righteousness isn’t something pulled out of a hat like a rabbit. It is a posture, a state of continual growth, a deep desire to get closer to God that yields His desired end for me.

Isn’t His desired end for you the same as your desired end?

Not when I was first starting out.

Why?

There were days I just feel like going His way as so hard and it is easier to just play it safe.

How is that bad?

If I play it safe and stay on the path I like, I will never attain perfection.

But there is nothing like perfection in this world!

By perfection I mean, getting to live my life exactly as he has predetermined I would live it.

Is that even possible?

Of course it is.

How?

By walking with God.

Don’t we all walk with God?

Do we?

I don’t know…you are the one who is thinking here so carry on.

Hahahaha….we are thinking together.

Nope. It’s you thinking so explain your thoughts.

Walking with God has to be more than just talk and religious practise. It is about relationship and relationship is about on going communication, on-going responsiveness and course correction. It is about listening and acting on instructions given. It is very, very active.

Ok…

This last week has taught me that walking with God is so much more than lingo

Lingo?

The things we say, like I am blessed, praise the Lord, the Lord is good or God bless you.

Those aren’t bad things to say are they?

Nope! The question is, what do they mean and what do they deliver to the person I say them to.

Really? Why are you making life so hard?

I am not, I just realised I must be deliberate about what comes out of me if I am going to be the mouth, hands and feet of Jesus.

Eish!!!! Now you are complicating life.

Am i? Don’t you want to be deliberate about how you live?

I do but….

But what?

It is too much work.

When you were training to be a doctor, did you ever say it is too much work to train?

No!

So why is it too much work to become the appointed person for God? Is it easy? No! It often seems impossible because there’s so much learning and a need to connect on a deeper level with God before I can even dare to say that I am on the way.

How do you learn?

Reading the word, listening to God for clear directions of where I need to go and how I need to engage and who I need to align with.

Daily?

What daily?

Doing all those things daily?

Yes, living in conversation with God moment by moment.

So is it true?

What?

That you are not who you said you are?

Yes, it is true! I am not yet who I said I am But, I am on the way there, one step, moment, day, year at a time. What about you?

What’s in a name?


Hi Jim,

Hey Di.

Can I ask you something?

Sure!

Is naming important?

Of course! It has been the bedrock of how we remember those gone before us.

Gone before?

Sure…our ancestors.

Really! Is that the only reason we name?

Well, no but it is the most common way to give names.

Why do we do that?

So we can remember people

Is it that important?

Of course it is!

Why?

So that their legacy lives on!

Really!

Sure.

Aren’t there better ways to keep someone’s legacy alive?

Probably, but why are you so uptight about this?

I have been thinking about names a lot…

And….

Well, you know how we are several of us named after grandma right?

Yes.

I have found that there are common characteristics in all of us.

What do you mean?

Well, we are all very sweet and even tempered most of the time but when we cross paths with someone and are done with them taking us for a ride we just walk away and never look back. We don’t talk to people who don’t add value to us. We speak our minds regardless of who we are

Mmhhhh…that is true.

We can also all be very vindictive when you cross us and we do not forgive easily.

You could have learnt that from each other you know?

But we didn’t!

How do you know?

I met most of them as an adult and in the last three years. Your point would hold water if we were raised in close proximity or knew each other from childhood.

There could be another explanation you know?

Ok…like what?

I have to think about it, but I can see this is really disturbing you.

It really is.

Why?

I always thought that I could overcome all the things in my life even those that my name bears but I wonder these days?

All the things your name bares?

Yes, all the things I do that make mum and our aunties say, “You behave just like your grandmother.”

Is that a bad thing?

It may not be to some people but I don’t always like it.

What don’t you like?

The possible impact it has on my life and choices. The predictability it gives to people who know granny. The expected familiarity from those who share my name.

When did all these thoughts begin?

A while back!

How?

My friend was telling me about her family and how all the men named after one uncle were all drunks just like he was. She also told how, her mother refused to name her brother after this uncle.

Are you sure about this?

Yes. I met her cousins and it is true, all the ones named after this uncle are just like him. So I looked further and we went to see the uncle her brother is named after and it was unreal.

What?

Her brother is very similar to this uncle but he has his diviation points. This uncle is the diametric opposite of the other uncle and so is her brother.

Then?

I needed to think about naming though I had never paid it much attention. I wondered what all the hoopla was about.

What hoopla?

That it is an ‘honour’ to bear the name you were given at birth and taboo to even think of changing that name.

Why?

Changing your given name was seen as deciding that those who named you didn’t know what they were doing. In fact, changing your name could be the highest insult you could give to your parents and the elders of the community.

So what happened?

I have wondered for a while then I asked myself, “What does God call me? Is it different from what I was named at birth? Why did God change Saul’s name to Paul upon his conversion? Why did God change Abram to Abraham and Sarai to Sarah?”

Wow! That is a lot of thinking.

I know but don’t you ever wonder if there is something you are missing that could be tied to your destiny and it could be fully expressed in your name?

Nope! I bet that isn’t all you wondered about.

Of course not!

Tell me more!

I wondered whether there is merit in changing my name.

Excuse me! Why would you change your name?

So that it would be more reflective of whom I am.

Are you serious?

Absolutely!

Why?

I just wondered! The question was whether like the disciples I should keep my name or if like Abraham I should change my name? Could names with ‘unpleasant meanings or negative connotations’ be redeemed or if my name had several meanings could I choose the meaning that is most like me and ascribe it to my name.

Ok, that’s a lot of thinking.

You know names are spiritual right?

Errrr….No!

When your name is called something is activated in the spiritual. For instance, if you are called joy, every time you are called many believe that joy will be activated in reference to you and your life.

Do you actually believe that?

I think there may be some merit to it.

Explain!

Think about it, sometimes people with certain names exhibit similar behaviour. Look at me and all those of named after granny, we exhibit her very behavior. We also often do some things the same and respond in similar ways but I have never really taken the time to understand. Does that make sense?

Yes it does.

So why did you behave like I was crazy when I asked the question the first time?

I needed to understand where you were going with your thought process.

Really! *throws a cushion at him* So you agree that we need to be careful about our names, their origins, their meanings and everything else that comes with them?

Yes!

Can we be certain that we understand everything about our name?

Not always but we can ask God about it.

Do you think he will respond?

Absolutely!

Do names enable or inhibit us?

It could be both always depending on what you believe.

What do you mean?

If you believe that God cannot transform your life then you are bound by the name you were given. On the other hand, God may ask you to change your name as part of your process with him and you will experience incredible freedom when you change it under his instruction. Or he could leave you with that name but do such a wondrous work in your life and overcome its limitations.

So it all comes back to me and God?

Absolutely! A name is the call you answer to and you need to be sure that it is the one God would have you answer to.

Why?

So that every time you respond, you are in obedience to him and connected to his plan for you and divine provision. Does that make sense?

Somehow!

Great! I’m off, I think you need to process some things.

I do.