Tag Archives: Health

Lasting Legacies

Today began just like any other ordinary day.  First was replenishing our water supply then preparations to go for morning fellowship. Little did I know that things had happened that would change our nation!

You see, we lost two national leaders and four members of our police force in a freak chopper crash early in the morning. Further to that, four years ago today, two members of parliament also perished in a plane crash. What a day!! The pain and sense of loss is greater for some more than others yet the whole nation of Kenya mourns the great men and woman we lost today.

Owing to the fact that we have become an expressive lot of people, I went online to see what others were thinking and what they had to say. I must say it took a lot of reading to just get through the posts on FB let alone Twitter. After loads of reading, I came across a comment that got me. It said, “Life is short, live your legacy so that you can leave a legacy.” Wagaki Mutonyi.

 Wow, is came alive to me…I was reminded that the only way we can leave a legacy is to live a life of purpose and conviction. It means we must be willing to stand and be counted for our convictions. Living a legacy comes from a clear knowledge of who I am, why I am here and what I can do for my community. This could mean I must be willing to give up something for the greater good of the community. The reality is that leaving a legacy is living for something that is greater than oneself.

I cannot leave a legacy if I am not convinced that my life is worth something and I can make a difference. It begins at home with my immediate family, then my extended family, friends, employees, colleagues and the world at large. Living a legacy demands that I remember that I could leave this world any time the Father calls me home after all, no one knows the time when God will call us home.

Then another thought came to mind. I realised that none of those who perished in the chopper crash or in the building that collapsed yesterday in Mlolongo, could have known that the goodbye they said to their loved ones in the morning was the last they would ever say. Imagine if one of them left after an argument or a harsh word was spoken. The day is over and the chance to change their words was gone never to return. Double wow!!

May my life be a living legacy of love, compassion, honesty, commitment and compassion. May I live my life according to the direction and instructions received from God everyday. May I find peace and strength in the knowledge that I have done the best I could do with everyday that I live. May I know for certain that if I lived this day again I would live it the same way because I have lived it to the best of my abilities.

Join me and aspire to live a legacy so we can leave great legacies.

Expectancy

Wasn’t it a shock for me when I sat back and realised that my experience were pegged on the wrong things and I had been setup for failure from the beginning. Let me explain.

 

We are all raised to expect certain standards from ourselves and others to enable strong and lasting relationships. We believed that there are things each of us should do that will help the relationship succeed. When the said things are not fulfilled, one would feel that the relationship is skewed unfair.

 

Recently, I read “The Shack” by Paul Young and my thought process was challenged and changed. He talks about God looking at us with expectancy not expectation. How absolutely radical! You see, expectations are standards and make us judge our relationships with others based on what either one of us are supposed to do and achieve. When the ‘requirements’ are not met we get disappointed and hurt.

 

God on the other hand looks at us very differently. He looks at us with expectancy. What is that? Well, He created us and knows our humanity. He knows that we may not get it right the first time yet He still has hope that one day we will get there. When we don’t get there He smiles, forgives and says maybe tomorrow. He looks at us in love and with the knowledge that one day we will get it and we will be all He desires of us to be.

 

In view of that, how then do we need to treat one another? I think the way to go is expectancy…meaning that we need to develop a never ending belief that it will be well and all will work out fine. I am learning every day that when I don’t put my expectations on others I am better able to have peace and joy all the time. However, I desire to move from expectation to expectancy, I must deal with myself and what I don’t like about me. I am forced to look at myself and deal with the issues that arise from the waiting and the attitudes I have inadvertently created in my heart, for I cannot give what I don’t have.

 

It is often easier said than done but I know that with God all things are possible and I will be in the space one day that  will not load expectations on people rather I will live with an open, warm and expectant heart that allows everyone to be themselves and free me to be happy and loving life.

 

Papa how I desire a heart like yours and love that is deep and wide as mine has failed me time and time again. I know it is part of a process and the process at times scares me to follow yet I want to believe that you are all I need and will ever need. 

One Minus Two

So I am walking down this new road and realised that alas…very little had changed. How could that be? Just the other day I was all high and glad to be different then poof….it has all gone.

So here I am wondering what is wrong with me. The fire is still there but is smaller; I seem to be walking with a lot of struggle instead of consistent victory. It is as through I have lost something I had on that first day…oh what has happened to the instant ability to conquer and vanquish the dragons of the past? When we see something new and make an adjustment to adopt it into our lives, we figure that all it will take to do it remain there is to choose to things differently. Wrong…so absolutely wrong!

Today I realised that the reason I am kinda stuck is the fact that I have not mastered the changes that are mine to master. Ok, let me explain. Yes I have the victory, yes my way has changed but have my internal behaviour and beliefs changed instantly? No not yet. In fact they are lagging way behind because this is a new season with a new mode of operation that is nothing like what I am used to. My whole mental, social, physical and spiritual paradigms must shift and the new ones are still filtering in.

Ok, let me say it differently. Let’s say I am overweight and have been told I must lose weight. There is the reality that thinking about losing weight will not get me there no matter how long and hard I think. I can dream and dream and dream but to no avail. There are practical steps I need to choose to take to achieve my goal.

First, I must find the reason I am overweight. Is it because food is a substitute? Do I just eat the wrong things and never exercise? Am I careless about what I eat? What is the reason behind all the weight I carry?

Next, I must commit to change my way of life in a way that will eliminate the things that help me put on the weight. This is where the work is. There must be a change of diet, a definite way to deal with my emotional issues and the inclusion of exercise in my life. The intensity or variety of the above combination will be different for everyone based on our situation. However, each of us must find our winning combination. Some of us will need accountability partners while others won’t. Some will exercise twice daily while others just a couple of times a week.

The Christian walk is similar to a weight loss plan but is not one size fits all and therefore I cannot prescribe for you what has worked for me. Each of us must go to the gym instructor and discuss the program that will work for us and make a personal commitment to the program. God deals with each of us as He created us hence the difference.

There will be days when we may not walk as we should but the joy is the “a saint is just a sinner who falls down and gets up.” We must just keep getting up and asking Jehovah for help to walk aright and keep walking.

I know for sure that I am on the right track and even when I fall flat on my face as I have done so often, he is there in love to pick me up, dust me off and lead back to the path. I am so glad that all I have to be is honest and normal and Jehovah He will guide my path and lead me on the right way home. Are you on the path and in close relationship with Him?

Separating ourselves

I know I have been on about obedience and it only seems to get broader and broader in its reach. My walk has been increasingly excruciating because I am being forced to look at myself and deal with issues I would rather not have to face. We all know that change is not usually easy but the harder part is just getting on with things.

 So this weekend I had the greatest time of my life in a long time and I just cannot explain the refreshment and renewal I felt. I was with friends and loved ones and that was just a blast. However, it got me thinking about the path my life has taken and I realised that this path has taken me away from many people and into the lives of others.

 I was thinking about the friends I have lost touch with and wondered whose fault it was mine or theirs or it is just life. On the other hand I know the saying that to let something go is to keep it. So why does my heart feel so alone and lonely? Why do I long for certain relationships that may never be restored? How do I want to call some people so badly but I know I would not have anything to say? Did I just walk away out of personal choice or did I really need to walk away? Was the relationship real or did I imagine it all? These are some of the questions that are running through my mind.

 Ok, now I sound like I am pessimistic yet I am just reflective and wondering since I so often feel the sense of loss and wonder what happens. One of my friends mentioned that people are just like that and very busy so we all let things go and we never really look for each other hence we should just let them be and live life. If this is true, why do I feel the need to keep my relationships going and feel the loss when they don’t? With these feelings, I beg to differ as I now know that we look for the people who matter. This then means that if I have not looked for you for a while or you have not looked for me for a while than the level of importance on either end is not that high. Get it???? On the other hand there are people who are always there and always strong and stable so no one ever thinks they ever need support. These are the people who will eventually fall off the radar and when they surface the stuff that has happened seems impossible to have come from that person.

 Look around and notice who has been missing and consider them. I would not advocate for forced relationships. There are people who after a while we know are no longer of value or substance and are therefore going to be a bog down to have. Before you go about looking for people just because you have not seen them take time to talk to God about it and be sure that this is someone He desires you have a lasting relationship with. If God is silent maybe this is a person who needs more time before you reach out.

 When you think of someone or miss them, please call them, text them or inbox them. They could be in the midst of a very hard time in life and need some encouragement or they could have just the word you need to hear that would totally change the way you live today. You never know who needs you to reach out and there is great impact you can have. You are the angel or the warm person and heart that God can use to minister his grace and peace to others. Do not let the opportunity pass you by. Additionally, you never know who will change the course of your life with a simple word or contact so let you senses be alert and open to the people you need to connect with and make the difference.

 A great week of renewal and strengthening.

A moment among the suffering

I have just visited a hospital. Strange to say but this is a very interesting place to be. Ok, it is sad that we are there because we are either sick or bringing someone sick. All the same it is interesting to watch people. The hospital I visited is a small one about 2km outside the central business district. It is in a well populated area south of Nairobi and is very pocket friendly. It is a forty-five bed hospital with excellent services. I know because I have actually been admitted here and spent almost a week with great care. Additionally, it is the recommended hospital for several insurance providers so there are many different people around.

I will call her Jane, is an elderly lady walking with a bit of a limp escorted by an elderly man I have decided is her husband and a younger lady who is her daughter by my assumption. She looks well for her age that I will guess is about seventy. There is nothing to tell me what she is going through but I know that there is something cooking since she is sent to have lab tests.

In the other corner is a lady of Semitic origin with her daughter. They are drinking pre-packed juice. I have always been mesmerised by their colourful long outfits that they so carefully match with their headgear. It is so interesting to be so colourful and beautiful at the same time. The doctor walks in and stares when he realises she is drinking juice and just laughs and walks away. My guess is that she is diabetic and they needed to do a blood sugar test and this will just blow it out of the roof.

There is also a gentleman from one of the local water supplies companies. He is impeccably dressed in a white branded shirt and a dark blue trouser. Coming to think of it he didn’t look sick then again, we do not wear sickness on our sleeves do we? He sits there and walks out often to go only God knows where so when his turn comes he is not there. Eventually he gets to tell of the nurse that he had been waiting and people who came after him have been seen and gone. How easily we forget that if we do not stay where we are supposed to stay our opportunities can pass us by.

Then there is…let’s call him John. He is a lab technician who has a seemingly know it all attitude. He determines that he needs to get another adult to hold my son down for the drawing of blood as though he is a maniac. It is interesting that everyone seems to find that they know the way children react. No one seems to expect children to be different. There is a general saying I am getting tired of hearing that goes like “That is normal with kids.” The funny thing is that I am on a very different plane. Everyone one seems to accept sickness and struggle as the norm but I refuse to do so. The more interesting part of this discussion came later in the day when I visited some friends and when they realised my son was sick they said this is normal. I remember one of my teachers saying that we need to dissociate with things out loud that the world would know where we stand. His actual words were “A silent Christian is a weak Christian.” It has taken me a while but I now am able to declare what I believe wherever I am and not bother what people say about it.

Sitting in hospital I realised just how much we have that can change the way our lives are going. It is so hard to be different yet when it starts coming to pass it is the best thing that can every happen to someone. It is the most liberating place I have ever been. The one thing I learnt from sitting in the hospital waiting room is that we go through life right next to each other and rarely learn much about each other. It is a lonely world out there and all we do is speculate on the things that make us who we are and often blame those that have gone wrong on others. For instance, if you had diabetes why would you drink a soda or juice just before a blood sugar test? If you really want to be seen by the doctor, shouldn’t you keep around the waiting room till your turn comes? When serving young patients shouldn’t one ask the parent or guardian in attendance how the child responds to these things rather than expect the usual reaction despite the 90% chance that the reaction will actually be the same….

My simple thoughts…