Tag Archives: Religion & Spirituality

Before Time

Sometimes all you need is to know that someone wants to be around you and loves you. Sometimes God seems so far away that it never makes sense to feel his love. I want to feel his love as it is really there however there are days I wonder what I need to do to make my life better.


Recently I came face to face with a series of major challenges and I could not take another step forward. I was in the midst of work and the only way to go on was to connect with people I know have been planted in my life for my good. However, I wasn’t sure how to tell them what I was feeling and what I needed. Then in the middle of the hardest moment two of my friends called to say they had been thinking of me and felt the need to find out how things are. Wow…this was astounding because it was in minutes of telling Father that I could not do this anymore.


I am reminded of the scripture Isaiah 65:24 (NKJV) “ It shall come to pass that before they call, I will answer; And while they are still speaking, I will hear.” This became my reality. Even as I did different things and faced different pressures I had answers at the appointed time. Initially I did not really see where it was coming from but as the week progressed and the solutions came more often I realised with renewed understanding that it had less to do with me and more to do with Father.


Daily I desire to walk in this knowledge and confidence and I pray for help from Father to be consistent in my walk. Come walk with me as we discover daily, moment by moment how close and dear He is to us.


Trimmed to size

That experience was utterly out of our league of expectation but then God was in control so what did we expect? It was a mind-blowing two weeks with work like I hadn’t seen in a while. We needed to do a lot of compilation and the people we had interviewed and earmarked for help has to cancel at the 11th hour.

I must admit that I was actually getting stressed about it but realized that stressing would not change the fact that work needed to be done all the same. So I sat back and asked God to take charge and remind me that He is the one in charge and it is His will that I was out to do and I had peace in a sec. There were still challenges but we had a great experience and a lot of learning.

My greatest lesson though was that I have to allow Him to select the team He wants me to work with because He is the one who begun my business anyway and if I try to change the game plan it will all blow up in my face.

There were times during the week where He reminded me that I was operating outside my area of blessing for the week and that I needed to step back and allow my team to be effective as He appointed for them to be. When I stepped back I would realize that at that particular moment I was the hindrance to the smooth operations and if I even went and sat in another room all would work better than if I was there micromanaging people. The inability to allow people to be independent had somehow crept back and I was goofing God’s plan.

Recently in a fellowship it all became clear…1 Cor 12 talks about us being one body in Christ and how we are many parts with different roles and each role is important where it is. Some parts are hidden from view because of modesty and others are exposed otherwise they cannot be fully functional. I realized that if I wanted to be in front and do everything I was trying to be all body parts yet my place is one of leadership and encouragement. How then can I be hand, brain, mouth, feet and eyes all in one? Utterly impossible!

Trying to be everything in that situation made me ineffective and affected the ability of my team to deliver a good product albeit for the few moments it was like that. So I got thinking, how often is it that I stand in the way of what God wants to do in and around me because of my perception of what I need to do and how I need to be perceived. Even as I stepped back and allowed my team to be all they could be my client did not forget my existence but realized that we are a true team and loved the experience even more.

I learnt two critical things here:

a. I must know my place in the heart of God and realize that he loves me no matter what then I will be free to be me and achieve even more than I ever anticipated.

b. I must know and accept my place in the body of Christ and at my place of work then I will be effective and attain the destiny that sent me here on earth.

I know there are others who have been or are where I was at and I know that there is still a lot to learn. The thing I carry with me at this point is that if I try to do things I am not meant to be doing they will back fire on me and cause problems for those around me. I must learn to be all I can be and attain the marks set out for me and the next level of growth and responsibility will come. Knowing Him more will bring me to the right view of life and position and increase my level of excellence in all I do.

Stay on task and on track and the rewards will be amazing.

My new Boyfriend

I have lived a life with few expectations of people but as I have grown up (hehehe), I have found that it is difficult to live that way all the days of your life. I was always the eternal friend who you can call after two years and we will pick up from where we left off. It worked for many years but not so well anymore. In the process of being so good for everyone I found great emptiness and loneliness beyond belief. However, I had never really thought about it or processed the feelings because I was so busy doing stuff for different people and working at making it in life that I did not have the time or presence of mind to see it.


One day a while back I woke up to the realisation that my heart is empty because I had given everything that was in me and never stopped to be replenished. I was like a driver who kept driving without thought of checking the fuel gauge then somewhere on the highway in the middle of nowhere the car runs out of fuel and dies. The only way I could have remained full is if I had remembered to refill. Not only had I not refuelled but I had lost some real friends along the way.


Expectations taint every relationship we have and affect our ability to be close to people. We need to give and get out of relationships and to get on well in life. So why is it that we only look for people when we are need help but do not take time to develop and sustain relationships all year round? Who are the people destined to walk with me and help me make impact in this life? I believe that friends are sent by God for a reason and our relationships will change as life goes on but we will only live well if we stick to God’s plan for us.


Are you like me? Have you felt lost, lonely and alone? I am finding that talking to God has directed me to adapt to the change in relationships and recognise who needs to stay and who needs to go. I have also learnt that I only have to be close to whomever God has directed me to and let all the others go. Letting go was so hard because I was comfortable to have many friends but what value had they added to my life?


I have found a new boyfriend who sticks closer than a brother and is not a man that He should lie or the son on man that He should change His mind. He is not judgmental and allows me to be me. When I do something He doesn’t like we talk about it and rectify things. I have learnt a lot about me by being with Him and we have a rich relationship.


His name is Jesus, son of the Living God and I am blessed to have Him as a friend and brother. Do you know Him? Take your time it is worth it and then some…



THE TRUMPET by Bill Burns — 3/1/11:

I am coming to you today as the wind, the water, the fire and as the rain — a habitation of My glory, so that you will flourish in My kingdom and no longer be distraught, condemned or oppressed.  I come to you to set you free and to call you forth into glory.  I am calling you to lay aside all that hinders you and to come by faith to receive that which I am doing.  I am sending you a fresh spiritual atmosphere that brings forth the baptism of My Holy Spirit upon you.  Come with expectation, with joy, peace and faith.  Come and receive.  No longer hold yourself from the water; no longer hide from the wind; no longer disallow the fire.  Come rather and enjoy the fullness of My expression and the fullness of who I am in you.  For, it is written that your body is the temple of the Holy Spirit; the Spirit of the living God; the God who transforms you, empowers you, helps you, keeps you in the Way and reveals His kingdom to you.  Come and learn.  Come and live.  Come and walk in My presence this day, says the Lord God.

Now this is surreal…just when I was wondering about many things I open my mail and there is this message. It is so interesting how God knows what we need to hear and when we need to hear it. This came like a lightning bolt at noon that fries all the electronics. Boy oh boy what a mighty God we serve.


I was sitting here thinking of all the things I needed to get done and totally clueless how to achieve it all. I was beginning to think that there was no way out of it, then again, there was no way out of it on my own. So as I sat and thought and brooded I realised I was not making progress. I remembered a conversation I had yesterday that got me thinking. I was reminded that in the midst of all things the one constant is the reality that God is in control and He doesn’t change or move and it is up to me to keep close to him and follow in His footsteps every day.


So if He doesn’t move then why do I at times feel like he is far away and not able to help? Could it be that I am the one who has moved away and lost the connection? Is it like a power cable strung from a house to an outside venue to cater for sound? There are several joints and so the cable is run along the grass to the point of need. Then imagine that someone doesn’t see it and then trips on it doesn’t the sound go off? Yup, it does. That is sometimes what happens to us in our relationship with God. Thing is that is how we often live our lives…we talk to God at different paces and sometimes we do not realise that we have moved ever so slightly.


You have heard the analogy of two planes flying in the same general direction but begin with a divergence of one degree. In an hour they will be so far apart they will not be able to see each other at all. Sometimes that is how we are with God. We start off well and are in tune and walk with God minute by minute so that it becomes usual. His voice is part of our lives and we are in tune. Then one day it just seems lonely and empty. Oh He is still at work and all but are you as close to His work as you were before? I find that sometimes things change and I need to realign to new directions and I didn’t quite get them clearly. I am aligning and realigning and it is interesting how good the peace that comes with that is.


It makes me ask you my dear reader, what does the above message mean to you? Where are you? What is God saying from these few lines? It could simply be a reminder that He loves you. A light tap on the shoulder to remind you how beautiful you are. What has He kept speaking into your heart about and you have had a hard time grasping it? I think it is a clarion call from the top of the mountain that He is interested in you.


Well, be like Mary in Luke 1:38 when she said, “I am the Lord’s servant…May it be to me as you have said…”