My Big Three

I recently delivered my first toastmasters speech and it struck me as something I should share here.

My name is Kyesubire Greigg, daughter of the Most High, storyteller extraordinaire, scribe, encourager and a hidden gem. Please join me on a quick journey.

Many of us define ourselves by where we were born but I believe that is limiting. I was born as the youngest of three in a cross-cultural home with such different drivers on either side of the family. As a result, I was independent at an early age and my inquisitive nature meant that I was hard to stop when I wanted to explore something. In fact, no challenge was too difficult to conquer.  My mother always says that if I was her first child, she would never have had another one. Why? I was on the other end of the spectrum of different. Oh! to have been a fly on the wall in my childhood just to understand the extent of my antics…but alas!

So, let me ask you…what defines you? Is it by your birthplace, tribe, work, possessions, or academic qualifications? Could it be your looks, networks, residence, or faith? Can you see what defines you?

Remember I said I was born third? What I did not say is that I am the second girl so there was no special treatment for me. You see, I am not the first child or first girl or only girl I am just the third child. In many families, being the last born is a big thing because you are the baby, the special one, the spoilt one or the pet. Alas, in our home, all children are equal, so none got special treatment not even the youngest. I had to figure out what would define and identify me?

Finding my grounding ideas did not happen overnight but at the end of it, I learnt three things that I will share with you today.

Sit tight and learn with me.

First, is curiosity. He who knows the end from the beginning, created me for a very specific purpose that I cannot override thus I find myself wondering about things and asking many questions. How is it made? Who made it? Why did they think it was useful? Are there other options? Where does this road lead? What is the worst that can happen? Will she get mad if I walk away? Oh, the list of questions is endless.

Curiosity has me trying new things once I begin to get answers for my questions. I am known to get on roads in the city and explore just to know where they go and what the houses look like there. I like to know what drives people, so I ask many questions and am punctilious about my notes. Above all, curiosity is my greatest teacher. She has led me to interesting life intersections before leading me down crazy paths. She has led me through deep dark valleys of adversity and up bright mountain peaks of victory. She has always led me to a place of answered questions and deep fulfilment, so I am grateful to her.

The second thing that defines me is fear. You did not expect that eh? Many of us avoid this girl at all costs because we believe she is bad. A while back in the middle of a life shattering crisis, Fear and I collided, and she gave me two choices. One, I could either run for the hills or I could deal with her and overcome. I had no option but to face her trembling and almost out of my mind, but I had to do this. We stared each other down, she appeared in ever situation from unexpected corners, in disguises looking like a friend yet she was a foe then she was a little ant in front of a great light, so her shadow looked like a lion. Suddenly I realised I could use her to grow as one looking into a mirror. She shines her light on what I need to deal with, and areas of growth then opens my mind to change. Now, I feel the fear but work through it and have become a stronger woman. Fear is now a dear friend.

Third but not least is family. I believe family is not biology rather it is that that person or those people who know why we are brought together and seek God about this journey. We pray over one another, call each other out, encourage one another and so much more. We go for long periods in silence but when we connect, it is as if we never stopped talking. Family is an anchor in the storm, the wind beneath my wings on the journey, the spanking when I am being naughty, the hug when I need love and comfort, the smile on a long journey, the silence when working things through, the laughter when we are celebrating…the gift that keeps on giving, the well that never runs dry. True family is who I am!

Have you had time to figure what defines you? Do you embrace it with all that is in you? Finding these three things has given me great stability so I ask each one to:

  • Take time to find what defines them,
  • Correct any negative definitions,
  • Grow and thrive wherever you are planted.
Photo by Ekaterina Bolovtsova on

Leave a Reply